What Dating and Hiring Have in Common
Whether you are looking for the ideal hire or the perfect mate, becoming an expert at attracting talent is a key component. To be successful at hiring, recruiting, and dating, we must attract candidates or talent.
I like to use the dating analogy when talking about recruiting the best talent because even if you aren’t on the dating scene you can probably remember what it was like to date.
I want to start by saying successful hiring and dating start with using a strategy.
Have you ever really thought of dating as a strategy? Well, I was single for 20 years and it took me a long time to realize that the strategy I was using wasn't working. When I changed my strategy, I finally found the one!
What is a strategy? Why is this important?
A strategy is a plan of action. One of the primary mistakes I see in recruiting is not having a plan or a consistent system. We must have a powerful plan of action to be effective at recruiting top talent. The setup at the beginning is critically important and so is each part of the process.
The strategy can be easy if you use my seven-step process:
Create a results-based job description.
Create a talent profile. This outlines the ideal candidate.
Conduct a pre-screen. Use specific questions to determine if a candidate matches the talent profile.
Conduct an in-depth interview. Ask customized questions to match the job description and talent profile and use action identifiers to determine if they should continue the process.
Conduct due diligence. Gather third-party research on a candidate to determine if they fit.
Identify key behaviors. Use behavioral profiles as part of the process.
Make the offer and establish conditions of performance.
Your hiring system forms the foundation for not only attracting the best people but also differentiating your organization.
Another pitfall I have encountered in recruiting and dating is falling in love on the first date. It is important to approach the process with a neutral point of view. You can do this by focusing on the other person, by asking good questions, and then listening intently to their wants and needs to determine if it is a good match.
Both in hiring and dating, people say too much too soon. They immediately start to talk about themselves, before they know the interests, skills, pain points or hot buttons of the person they are interviewing or on a date with. This is like telling someone you love them on the first date. I call this the kiss of death. If you don’t spend time on the front end discovering what is important to someone, you can potentially lose the person’s interest.
How many times have you been pitched intently when the salesperson hasn’t asked you any questions to uncover your needs?
Completing an in-depth interview or needs analysis is the key to discovering what both parties need to know to continue the process. In dating terms, this is like courtship. Admittedly, this is an art and science, yet if you carefully consider your criteria and do not let your emotion about someone get in the way it will be easier. This is one of the few areas where I advise people not to trust their gut instinct.
I recommend that you meet with your final candidates anywhere from three to five times in different settings. Why? Everyone is on their best behavior on the first date or the first interview. They dress appropriately, use good manners, are charismatic, and will try to make you fall in love with them. When you continue to meet with them, they become familiar with you. When they become familiar, they let their guard down. When they let their guard down you will begin to see the real person.
After taking them through the in-depth interview process, the final step, the offer, can be a minefield. I use a consultative approach to talk about compensation. If a candidate is talented, they will have multiple offers from competing companies. You need to make sure your offer is attractive and that you have built a relationship so that when you make your offer they accept or are open to negotiation.
When you meet with the candidate to make the offer, ensure you are prepared. Your goal is to get them to agree to join your company. Remember, making an offer is a sales skill. You don’t have to be a master salesperson to be good at this. You just need to be aware that this is your top candidate, and you want them to say yes.
There is one final step to ensure that you start the relationship on the same page. I call this discussing the conditions of performance. Articulate what your expectations are in terms of performance prior to them starting because if they raise an eyebrow or object, you might not want to hire them.
When an employee starts the job, you want to make sure that what you have promised throughout the recruiting process is delivered and the employee in turn should deliver what they promised. This is the beauty of the process. Because you spent the time on the front end to make a great hire, the training and onboarding should be easier.
If you follow the seven steps laid out in this article, you have created the foundation for making a great match. Your new relationship is built on a foundation of clear communication, shared values and culture, and mutual respect.
